You Never Really Forget
by Wynter-Solstice
Summary: "Never give up. Go after what makes you happy..." That's what her father always told her. Why should now be any different? But KENDALL had walked away, KENDALL had said he had never felt anything... How to bear the truth when all she wanted were the lies?
1. The Final Meeting

**I don't write hurt/ angst well. Maybe because I am sometimes able to feel whatever I write, and there's no way I want to cry. I began writing this before, and stopped. Reasons don't really matter right now.**

**Starting again. **

_**Love is painful. There's no doubt about that. But you should never give up on it. There's always joy after sorrow.**_

**(It says a lot about what's going to happen)**

* * *

><p>The sky was overcast, threatening almost. Occasionally bold streaks of lightning raced through the clouds, accompanied by its thunder. A cold wind blew into the auditorium, causing 14-year old Jo Taylor's hair to stand on edge. She liked the rain, but thunder scared her much more than it should a girl of her age.<p>

The end of the school year... the beginning of her summer holidays... her entry into the higher grade. These things normally excited her, but now, she simply didn't want to think.

Wrapping her arms around her head as she lay on the table in front of her, Jo stared blankly ahead. Lost in thought, even amidst the screams of the ecstatic children around her, telling their friends about their report card.

She had done well, much better than she thought she would since the term that had passed had been just hectic and mentally tiring. Briefly, Jo wondered if her father would be pleased, crediting her drop in performance to her then-blossoming relationship with Kendall Knight.

_Kendall_. Just as old as she, with his light brown hair and green eyes. Jo sighed. At times she wondered how was it that she knew her so well and then at others, he refused to delve and expected her to tell him EVERYTHING that she was feeling.

How could she explain certain things? How could she explain that she was banned from talking to him _forever _since apparently, he was a bad influence and someone who didn't care about her as much as he claimed. Her father's opinion.

It didn't help much that she blatantly denied all claims to be stumped by the statement that she was too young to have a boyfriend.

Tears ran down her face as she struggled to hide them, as she had for the past ten minutes. Would it have done for Kendall to have seen her crying?

Nope.

He knew that she was emotional at times, but never exactly had seen her cry. Something that Jo somewhat wanted. Maybe she would've wanted the comfort, but then... what would everyone say if they saw? And they asked her why?

Some things, one simply tried _not _to do.

It could've been easier on her now confused mind to simply talk to Kendall when the new school year opened. But that was impossible, well now anyway. Nothing was the same. And nor could it ever be.

It was as though everything as against her... Finally after _years _of being the one no one really wanted to talk to, or relate to, or tried to understand, she had found someone who did all that, while maintaining the need for her NOT to change her personality. It made her feel special, and not emphasizing that she was the weird girl in class who couldn't keep a friend for more than a term.

Maybe Kendall knew that bit about her and felt sorry? Or maybe he actually liked her for her. Once he had said that before, he thought she was a boring nerd who was just weird, but then realised the exact opposite. No one had ever said that to her before. No one. In elementary school, the former was perhaps mentioned to her many times just _because _she had straight A's. They didn't care if she could play just as hard as the others. And that was just the way life was for her.

Kendall wondered why, after everything she went through, why she still chose NOT to say a bad word about her dad. Yes, she thought it was bitterly unfair she had to voluntarily give up what she liked the most because her father refused to see the good in Kendall and stressing the fact that it was liking him, and worrying about everything that was going on in her head at that time that had contributed heavily on her fallen grades. But she couldn't hate him, not after all those years when he had held her hand through the rough patches of life and tell her there was nothing to worry about. It was because of him that she was enrolled in a School of the Theatre Arts near her home.

Her father cared for her and simply just wanted the best... And apparently, for him, that list did not include Kendall Knight.

* * *

><p>So the last day of school...<p>

The night before, Jo had tried to practise everything in front of her mirror. If her Dad had asked, she could've easily said she was revising a scene from her Drama classes. But that conflict never presented itself so she was able to say all that she wanted to herself without interruption.

But she had cried. Cried, knowing that chances were things were never going to be the same again between Kendall and her, knowing that Kendall could move on if he wanted while ignoring her, knowing that he had another good friend who happened to be a girl, knowing that her heart was breaking and refusing to believe in love.

She had come to school that morning trying her best to keep her calm while attempting to tell Kendall everything that she felt. An impossible mission but one that had to be attempted nevertheless.

But she was never alone with him... as _Selena _was there with him 24/7. She tried not to seem impatient, or mad. . .Playing with her phone as they whispered things in the middle of the classroom, of which she heard nothing. It wasn't fair, as she deemed it, that Selena was _going _to see him sometime during the vacation while she was NOT, nor could for that matter.

Jo opted to hiding in the bathroom until she thought it was safe to come out (i.e. when she thought they were done). She wished she knew why she was feeling that way since after all, she did not expect to see Kendall moping around the place the following term since Jo could not be with him. She expected that, and accepted that fact. Yet somehow, things never seemed okay when they unfolded right before her eyes.

By the time she had come out, Kendall was waiting right outside the bathroom door. How he knew she was there baffled her, but she tried not to let her emotions show.

"So you're not talking to me?" he said, "You could start by explaining why you were in the bathroom for so long."

"I wasn't in there for _SO _long," she snapped, "Just a couple of minutes."

"I'm not going even to bother asking for what."

"I don't have it today," she murmured softly, knowing immediately what he was talking about.

"Have what?" And he sounded relieved.

"I don't have my sharpener today."

"Why though? Who sits in a bathroom for ages doing nothing."

Jo shrugged, refusing to want to tell him.

"And that's exactly why I tell you I don't care to know what you're feeling anymore."

She looked at him, internally debating with herself whether she should. With all her practice, she didn't exactly prepare with Kendall getting upset.

Pained, she murmured, "I'm going to miss you terribly. I know, it sounds stupid but, I'm going to miss talking to you, being with you, doing weird stuff with you... And it hurts, knowing that as much as I want to, I can't."

She looked away. Not wanting to see Kendall expression.

"You know," he said, equally as softly, "Seeing you for a minute is better than never seeing you again."

Jo managed a weak smile, marvelling at how easily Kendall could change her mood.

"Is there anything else?" he asked as she put her backpack on and walked to the audit.

"Yes."

"Then why don't you say anything?"

"'Cause I don't want to cry in front of you."

It was the first time Kendall looked at her like that. And she wasn't sure how to react.

They threw their bags in the corner and slumped to the floor, Kendall now playing _Bob the bouncing Ball _with his phone. Maybe, he was hoping she would say something as long as he was not giving her his primary focus.

But it just made it worse.

"If I talk would you listen?"

"Yep."

Moments passed in silence until, "Wait, are you still cutting yourself?"

"No," despite the obvious cuts of his forearm.

Then, "Maybe I am."

"Why but you promis..." she cut off, knowing immediately what his rebuttal would be. She had done it too, at a point in time previously.

"You have to swear that you wouldn't during the holidays."

"You're not going to be seeing me, how would you know?"

Jo bit her lower lip. This was her fault. If she hadn't got mad at herself the week before, Kendall wouldn't be doing this now. She sank back into her mood of depression.

Now she really couldn't say anything, as much as she wanted to. She reached over to get her bag, having brought something for Kendall as she had practised to give him. But he had already gotten up.

"I have to go now," he said, matter-of-factly. "Bye."

"Bye," Jo murmured, wondering briefly if that was how her last conversation with Kendall would be.

She turned away, stuffing the thing for Kendall deeper insider her bag, willing the tears not to fall, not there at least.

After everything, she thought.

_Since November, two years ago. . . ._


	2. Best Friends

**The following chapters are written from Jo's memory. So... once you see the italics, you know. Hope everyone likes it.**

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER TWO<strong>

"_Hey Jo."_

_I spun around, only to see Jett approaching from behind. I sighed. He was probably the last person I wanted to see right now._

"_How'd you do?" he asked, referring to the Math test we had just gotten back. _

"_I. . . I... My father is going to kill me," I managed to say._

"_It can't be that bad," he said, always the caring friend, "How was it?"_

"_Bad."_

"_Worse than six?"_

"_Jett... " I looked up at him, "No."_

"_See, so what are you so mopey about?"_

"_I got nine. And the test was out of twenty."_

_He nodded understandably, knowing my father from those times he had seen him at the Drama school we attended together on weekends._

"_So... do you want to go for ice-cream?" he asked._

_I smiled, but shook my head. "No thanks, I have hockey now."_

_He looked stunned. "What's a girl like you playing hockey for? And since when?" _

"_Is there a problem with that?" I snarled, folding my arms, facing him. Why was there a problem if a girl wanted to play sports?_

"_No... it's just..." he cut off abruptly. "I thought you were into acting," he said finally._

"_I AM," I stressed, "But it's just something else I like doing."_

_He shrugged, clearly disapprovingly. "Whatever. Suit yourself."_

_He turned to exit class, as I squirmed uncomfortably._

"_Don't look now, but I think your best friend is here to meet you," Jett hissed, without turning back to see me._

_I looked around him. "Kendall, what are you doing here?" I asked._

"_I thought you had hockey today..." he replied, holding up his stick, "And it's a lonely walk all the way to the audit."_

_Okay, he knew me too well. I LOATHED being alone, having spent most of my childhood with my dad as my best friend. High school was a pain for me at first since having your dad around all the time when you're fourteen wasn't exactly cool to most of my peers, and I had to make actual friends._

_And I guess for the beginning of my teenage life, I was considered anti-social. Maybe that's why my father decided to let me try out in acting. To open up? _

_I smiled weakly at Kendall, who shot a confused glance at me, momentarily glaring at Jett._

"_Are we going now, or are you going to stand there all day?" he asked, a tinge of sarcasm evident in his voice. I picked up all my belongings and proceeded out the classroom. _

_..._

"_What's up with you and Jett?" Kendall asked as we made our way to the audit._

"_He's behaving like an idiot just because he doesn't want me to play hockey," I replied, as Kendall made a face of horror._

"_i always thought he was weird," he murmured, "But not SO weird... But what are YOU so upset for? It's hardly a crime for someone to tell you they rather you become some girly-girl."_

"_I don't know, Kendall, Jett is one of my friends that always seemed to like me for me... Sometimes I get afraid if he thinks I'm getting too different."_

"_You could be whatever you want to be," he told me, "And no one can stop you, unless you let them."_

"_You know you always make me feel better, right?"_

"_What are friends for..."_

_..._

_The auditorium was rather spacious, even if did not contain any ice. The coach had decided, in order to prevent any injuries, we'd learn field hockey before the ice. But despite the effort to include safety, it was just me who thought it was a good idea. _

_On the practice team, there was Carlos Garcia, a Latino with black hair and was about five foot two. He was friendly, if not always hyperactive on Fruit Smackers, and was one of Kendall's three best friends._

_And then, there was James Diamond, a five foot four, with his perfect, long, mahogany hair. There were times he reminded me of Jett, with his strange tendency to go everywhere with a mirror and his belief that he was the most handsome thing since... I have no idea what. But he was nice, something I appreciated from one of Kendall's friends._

_Logan Mitchell. If there was one person on the entire squad that reminded me of myself, it was he. He was in Kendall's class (and hence his friend) and from what I heard, his marks could have rallied mine. I was happy that he too was on the hockey team as it only proved my point that I could my schoolwork AND extra-curricular simultaneously. He was a brunette too, but with hair not as long as James'._

_There were also some younger kids that interacted with me so little, that I guess my memories of them are all a blur. I mean, not even the names I can remember. But all in all, there were about ten of us; Myself and the blond-haired, green-eyed Kendall Knight included. It shocked me that there was someone who didn't mind being my friend despite the fact that he had so many others. I had bad experiences with two-faced, back-stabbing people before, and well, with Kendall, I was happy I NEVER had to hide the real Jo under layers of, not lies, but a hidden personality. _

_Hence the reason that when my father asked what made Kendall such a good friend of mine, I couldn't respond... without being afraid that I'd hurt him with my response. But my explanation excluded my father. I couldn't be anything but myself with him. But he wouldn't/ couldn't understand._

_So... It was hockey time. I didn't play excellent, but being with everyone that I trusted made it a whole lot more fun. Well, maybe not when Kendall laughed at me, when I attempted to hit the ball, but didn't really hit it (Since it was field hockey, we used a ball instead of a puck). It was just one of those things that just stood out for me in my high school life._

* * *

><p><strong>LATER THAT EVENING<strong>

"_Hey Dad," I said, kissing him on his cheek as I jumped into the Toyota Wish that was our family station-wagon._

"_Hi Jo. How was your day?" he asked, ever the caring parent._

"_Good. But what are you doing here so early?"_

"_I got off work early... I have a surprise for you."_

_I looked at him curiously. My dad worked in the CIA... did they even give days-off? "What? Is it something good?"_

_He smiled. "Your drama school called," he said, "To tell me that they're planning on having a production at your school. They want you to audition."_

_I was stunned, no, breathless. This was deathly terrifying. Why? I didn't want to be on stage with people WATCHING me. Kinda defeated the whole point of drama, I know. But, I couldn't. Simply couldn't._

"_The play's Romeo and Juliet," my dad continued. He sounded as though he wanted a reaction from me and I realised that, unlike me, he was totally excited. I couldn't crush his hopes._

"_I can't wait to audition," I managed to say, lacing the statement with sufficient enthusiasm._

"_Ummm, honey, and there's one more thing... You know Jett?"_

"_Of course I know Jett. What's wrong?"_

"_It's just that... well, he can't fit the part of Romeo... and there's a part of the play where you have to ..."_

"_Ewww, Dad! That's disgusting, I wouldn't EVER do that with anyone... But why can't Jett try-out?"_

"_He could, but he can't be Romeo.. You see, they're looking for someone who could sing, act and dance... And Jett is sort of limited in that regard."_

_I smiled. That seemed like an understatement. I sat back in my seat, lost in thought. If I wasn't going to have someone familiar as the main role with me, things just got a lot worse. Unless..._

_Maybe I should call Kendall later?_

* * *

><p>"<em>NO WAY," Kendall intoned over the phone. There's no way I'm auditioning for anything."<em>

"_But, please? I can't do this alone." I was on the verge of tears and hoped that he didn't hear them in my voice._

"_Are you crying?" he asked. Yep, he could've heard that too._

"_No... why Kendall? Why can't you audition?"_

"_I don't like being on stage. I'm not even sure I can act, or sing, or dance."_

"_But, I believe you can. Trust me on this, you'd be brilliant. Aren't your friends supposed to know these things?"_

_He made no sound for a couple of seconds, and then, "Fine, I'll audition, but only if Carlos, James and Logan come too. And I don't want you there."_

"_Ouch. Harsh."_

"_That's life. All things come with sacrifice."_

_I wished I was standing next to him. He deserved to be whacked with a book at that moment._

"_So see you tomorrow," I asked._

"_Maybe. It depends."_

_And he cut the call._

_Didn't he EVER give me a straight answer?_

* * *

><p><strong>A WEEK LATER. . .<strong>

**LIST OF CAST MEMBERS FOR THE PRODUCTION OF ROMEO AND JULIET**

Romeo Montague: KENDALL KNIGHT

Juliet Capulet: JO TAYLOR

Benvolio: CARLOS GARCIA

Mercutio: LOGAN MITCHELL

Tybalt: JAMES DIAMOND

Rosaline: MONA HENDERSON

Mr. Capulet: JETT STETSON

Mr. Montague: ADAM PEVERELL

_Other minor characters to be decided._

...

"_I told you you'd be fine," I said to Kendall the moment I saw him. "You were worried for nothing."_

"_I wasn't worried. Just nervous."_

"_Makes a difference?"_

"_Yes, it does."_

_Again with the silence. I stared at my shoes until Kendall decided to clear his throat and ask:_

"_Jo, I have something to ask you."_

"_Well, go ahead..." I said in a teasing voice that he used on me only A LOT._

"_We have to kiss," he murmured simply, looking at me, as though examining my reaction carefully._

"_I...I.. It's not real," I said, "It's our characters that need to do it."_

"_So you have no problem with it."_

_I shifted uncomfortably. "You're my friend, Kendall, one of my best friends. You just don't go around kissing someone just because you know them... And you definitely DON"T kiss your friend."_

_He looked at me funnily, as though my words hurt him, for what reason I was not sure. I expected that he was going to argue._

_But he didn't._

_All he said was, "People do, you know Jo. But if you don't, that's okay with me."_

_And with that he turned and headed off to class, leaving me feeling just as confused and lost as I looked._

* * *

><p><strong>Please review... It's what gives me the impetus to keep writing.<strong>


	3. Unrequited Love?

**I written so much in the third person that to update this story felt weird. It's still from Jo's thoughts and memories (sorry to those who find it meticulous) In short, not one of my favourite chapters...**

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER THREE<strong>_  
><em>

_There was something about people that I enjoyed observing. How different situations called for a different response, and with no two people was it the same. Maybe it was the actress in me, or maybe, this tendency of mine was just yet another aspect on what made me Jo._

_I found myself looking at my best friend in a whole different light from that moment earlier in the day. He had done something I least expected him to do. He succeeded, no questions asked, which, though I never doubted him, surprised me nevertheless. Kendall was never one to feel at ease on stage._

_But here he was._

_His question too planted a small seed of doubt in my mind. Wait, not doubt... something else. And I couldn't put my finger on it. Kendall was one of the few people who could make me feel this way. Second-guessing myself._

_It made him feel special. It made me feel conflicted. I wanted nothing better than to wipe that irritating smirk off his face, as though he knew some secret I didn't. As if I was being completely daft to something obvious. If it was SO important, why didn't he just TELL me? But no. He insisted on doing otherwise._

_But the feeling of uncertainty didn't want to go away. It was rational, completely NORMAL, to say to myself that if Kendall was mad, that was none of my concern, ESPECIALLY since he had no good reason to be. But I couldn't. The brief moments I saw him between periods, he pretending he didn't see me, engaging completely in conversations with his newly-found friend Selena, I felt as though it was my fault in some way._

_And the guilt was driving me crazy. _

_The worst part, all this happened in the course of five hours. _

* * *

><p><em>We had hockey that evening. And maybe, through some fault of mine. I forgot that I was mad at him. How could you stay mad at someone who kept you so much at ease in situations outside of your comfort zone? And truth be told, I was no athlete... but physical exercise could do everyone some good.<em>

_All I could remember was the way he smiled in that boy-ish way, the way he held out my hockey stick for me when I tripped herself... simple things that made Kendall Knight who he was._

"_Kendall?" I asked, as we stood in a line, awaiting our turn for a one-on-one with the instructor._

"_What?" he replied, his voice sounding unnaturally composed._

"_Can I ask you something?"_

"_Listening..."_

_I tried not to think that he was trying to keep conversation short, but the facts lay against him. "Are you mad with me?"_

_He looked at me as though I was the one who was crazy. "Me? Mad? At you?" he repeated, as though stunned. "Why would I have any reason to be mad at you?"_

"_But... today?"_

"_Jo... seriously. Do I need to talk to you every minute of every single day?_

_I probably looked hurt because he continued. "One day... I had homework to do... and you act like... like..."_

"_Like what?"_

"_Like you're madly in love with me and you're afraid I'll fall in love with someone else."_

_My mind went fuzzy. Did he really just say that? People didn't fall in love with their best friends, no matter what they say on tv or on the movies. Certain lines had to be drawn and that was one of them. _

_I gripped my hockey stick tighter, battling my inner rage that he even ASSUME something like that. "I can't believe you," I whispered finally._

"_Really?"_

"_I can't believe you'd stoop that low."_

"_I..." he cut off. Maybe he actually heard me that time. His eyes met mine with shocking emotion._

"_You stormed off this morning after the cast was announced, without a word," I added for good measure. "You ignore me for the whole day, pretend you didn't see me when I walked right in front of you... and now you think I'm in love with you?_

"_We're friends, Kendall, best friends. I tell you things I don't tell other people, we do crazy things that convince others we are mentally unstable... but I'm not in love with you."_

_Kendall said not one word as he walked forward. His knuckles seemed white on the grip, his face tense. The ball came at him, and he struck it with such a ferocity that scared me. It hit the back of the net in milliseconds, a feat none of us yet had succeeded._

"_Very good Kendall," the teacher said, but the words washed over him. No quirky smile, no acknowledgement that anyone had said anything to him. His eyes were on me, as though burning a hole straight through my being. He looked as though he expected me to say something. And I knew I had to._

"_That was scary," I said. And I watched one his eyebrows go up in mock amusement._

"_It was meant to be," he whispered back._

"_Kendall, listen, must we be this way?" I asked._

"_You encouraged it Taylor."_

_I flinched. He used my last name. No one used my last name._

"_You just..."_

"_I know what I did. Maybe it would have been okay if Jett said it?"_

"_What does Jett have anything to do with this?"_

_Tears started to blur my vision. Why was he being so cruel?_

"_Face it Jo, you like him more than you like me. You listen to everything he tells you but not me."_

"_But why does that matter? __**Since**__ when does it matter?"_

"_Since I realised you don't trust me. You think you have all right to make as many friends as you could, with people who are shallow and I shouldn't care._

"_But the minute I talk to Selena you have a problem. You think that I'm in love with her when WE are just friends. Just like me and you are."_

_He paused. "Well...?"_

"_Well what?" _

"_Anything to say?"_

_What could I say? I didn't like Selena. It was my own childhood memories that prevented me from warming up to her._

"_I never said you couldn't have other friends Kendall."_

"_That's what you make me believe."_

_I chose not to reply to that. "Why are we fighting today?"_

"_Cuz if we don't get this over with how can we act as we're supposed to?"_

_It was my turn to look stunned. "Act how?"_

"_Act as if we're in love... Don't you know, by the time this play is over, everyone would think we're really together... If there's nothing between us, it'd be better if we clear it out now."_

"_People should learn to mind their own business," I thought savagely, and then shook my head at my idiotic notions._

"_No what?" he asked, his voice much calmer than it was previously._

"_No they wouldn't. Everyone knows we're just close friends..."_

"_You have to meet Jett."_

_I scoffed. "Jett? Seriously Kendall?"_

"_Face it. You like him."_

_I looked away. Did I really have to put up with this? Thankfully the teacher was packing up, which meant we would be dismissing us soon._

_I put my stick down and faced the blond. He was not much taller than I but I still had to look up to see into his eyes._

"_Right now, Kendall, I don't LOVE anyone. I make friends, as does everyone. I laugh with people, like normal. And besides if I had to love someone..." I cut off. That was an embarrassing thought._

"_What?" he asked._

"_It would be with someone who probably doesn't feel the same way."_

"_A real person right? Not those imaginary book characters you crush on."_

"_One, they're not imaginary. And two, yes, the boy is very much real."_


	4. What if?

**Hey all. Just in case you're wondering. I did delete my last published chapter. It really missed a lot of pieces that couldn't wait for the next one. I hope this one makes sense.**

**And thank you for your reviews... If you didn't, well, I wouldn't know what sounds horrible, would I? **

**On with the story... :D**

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER FOUR<strong>

_It was probably the longest, most quiet drive, I had ever experienced to get home. My thoughts were everywhere, but not lingering on any one in particular so that I could actually think it through. I wanted to cry, to scream, and to laugh all at the same time. Yet, none of the emotions associated with the actions seemed to make sense when done simultaneously._

_I stared blankly out of the window. The music that was being whispered from the car radio merely seemed to act as a backdrop to my mood and hard as I try to zone out mentally, to NOT think about anything, to try to flash a look in my father's direction to give him the assurance that everything was fine, I couldn't._

_But why? USUALLY, it was easy to talk to him... about anything related to school, or friends. But now...? What was wrong with me?_

_I risked a glance at my dad's profile. His features were tense and I knew that he was worried about me. "Dad," I managed to say, softly enough, "Did you have a rough day?"_

_He shot a surprised look in my direction, which I translated to mean, "ME? We're supposed to be talking about you." But if I had been correct, which of all things in the world that I usually am, he didn't show it._

"_It was normal," he replied, "Work is usually tiring." He sighed. "But what about you, Jo? When you entered the vehicle this evening, I knew you weren't happy."_

_I flinched, hoping my father hadn't noticed the discreet motion. Of course he had noticed that; he worked in the CIA for God's sake... it's what he was trained to do._

"_Jo...?" he prodded._

_I opened my mouth to say something, then I heard the song that was coming over the radio. I bit my tongue, hard, willing the tears that were beginning to cloud my vision, not to fall. But at least Dad's eyes were on the road, on not focused on mine... yet._

_I stayed silent for a couple of moments as the song began_

_When I was younger, _

_I saw, my daddy cry_

_And curse to the wind._

_He broke his own heart_

_And I watched_

_As he tried to reassemble it..._

_And my momma swore that_

_She would never let herself forget_

_And that was the day that I promised_

_I'd never sing of love_

_If it doesn't exist._

_Friendship had always been like that for me. It didn't exist without the betrayals, and lies, and... the things to hurt me. It was just something I had learnt to accept. Which I did._

_And then I met Kendall. The exception to every rule I've ever put up in my social life._

_Do NOT, under any circumstances, tell people about your personal life._

_Try not to become too emotionally close to said person_

_Keep as much as my freedom as possible to walk away if necessary._

_But I couldn't tell my father that. That I HAD AN EXCEPTION. The first thing he'd say was that I should forget about him before things became too out of hand. But could you forget your best friend? Could you pretend they don't exist simply because someone told you to? Can those memories ever be replaced?_

_The answer was no. But the actual truth was sort of embarrassing too. _

_I could so imagine telling my father that my best friend and I had a fight because he claimed I was in love with Jett, AND jealous of his friendship with Selena._

_So I went to the path of least resistance._

"_Me and Kendall had a fight today," I sighed, cringing internally at my words. I sounded SO idiotic. "Really stupid thing too."_

_Dad didn't press, but the water evident in my eyes obviously told him something. "I think..." he said slowly, "I think you should stay away from him for a while."_

_I merely nodded, though knowing fully well that I wouldn't. Both Kendall and I had been wrong, and unless I was mistaken, I had my first Drama rehearsal with him tomorrow._

_I felt a single tear roll down my cheeks, and with subtlety, I wiped it away, revelling in the fact that here I was, crying over a song, that didn't seem to want to end._

_Maybe I know, _

_Somewhere,_

_Deep in my soul,_

_That love never lasts._

_And we've got to find other ways_

_To make it alone,_

_Or to keep a straight face._

_And I've always lived like this,_

_Keeping a comfortable distance,_

_And up until now,_

_I had sworn to myself,_

_That I'm content with loneliness,_

_Because none of it_

_Was ever worth the risk._

_The thoughts floated hazily in my mind. Describing how I felt about people in general, for the last five years of my life. I didn't know what love was... I had never seen it before my eyes, and thus, never had to chance to believe in it._

_After all, seeing is believing, right?_

_But what if, what if it was possible to be in love someone without knowing it yourself? Could it be?_

_I shook my head, as though clearing the unpleasant thought from my head. There were some things I was absolutely certain of:_

_There was no way I was in love with Kendall... that is, the love people talked about._

_Love, for me, could never have anything but pain._

_Why trust and care about someone who would not do the same for you?_

* * *

><p><em><strong>THE NEXT DAY<strong>_

_My Literature books were open on my lap as I bent over to read them, my blond hair creating a curtain around my head. I was sitting on the apron of the stage, trying my best to feel the character of Juliet as best as possible._

_It was going to be one of the toughest roles I ever played._

_Someone was standing in front of me. Someone taller than I was, by an inch. I took a deep breath before looking up._

_Jett._

_He smiled his quirky smile, which ordinarily would have made more feel more comfortable in such situations, but that day, it only put me on edge._

_After my conversation with Kendall yesterday, I couldn't help but pay attention to the things Jett for me. Everyone said that he was a stuck-up, selfish brat but, could I honestly say that I saw those qualities in him?_

_But Kendall was the one to be right about people. He was one of the few who could read me like the back of his hand. Who said it didn't hold for other people too? _

_I managed a weak smile in Jett's direction before saying, "There's something I have to tell Kendall, so I'll see you around."_

_I felt bad that I had just walked out on him, but I hoped he wouldn't mind too much. After all, homework was always a priority for me..._

_..._

"_Didn't think you were coming over," Kendall said to me as I neared, "But I almost feel sorry for Jett. He looks as if you punched him in the stomach."_

"_Really?" I asked, turning around. He was nowhere in sight. _

"_I did say almost." He smirked at his inside joke._

"_We're going to be starting soon, and I was just wondering... would-you-mind-staying-me?" I blushed deeply, hoping the words I rushed towards the end were understandable enough for Kendall to hear._

"_Say what?"_

_No such luck._

"_I said... Would you mind staying with me... as we're partners in this thing?"_

_He raised his index finger to correct me. "Not partners... soulmates."_

_I bristled , but not with anger. The words touched me, in a way his words never touched me before. _

_..._

_We walked towards the stage when the director approached. The Director... Our Drama teacher... and Literature teacher... She really dominated a setting. A force to be reckoned with... I really hoped I didn't get on her bad side._

_She didn't bother with the meticulous details... as long as she knew who our characters were, she was happy._

"_Romeo... and Juliet..." she said. And Kendall and I stepped out of the group. I shot my best friend an anxious look, and nodded understandably. He KNEW how I felt about the lady._

"_Breathe Jo," he hissed, "She could taste your fear."_

_I snorted, granting me a suspicious look from HER. But it was worth it._

_That's why I needed Kendall there... That's why he was my best friend._

_Because he understood._

_He walked with me towards the centre of everyone. I could feel the scrutinizing glares of my peers... I could especially feel Jett's... but for some reason, it didn't matter. Nothing even mattered at that point. _

_The teacher handed us a CD. " Somehow, you two have to learn to ballroom dance..." she said, "A professional would be coming soon so I need the both of you to get the CD player from the office and just listen to the music." She smiled as though she was sharing an inside joke... with herself._

"_I doubt it would be the type of music that you listen to... but it isn't the actual song we'd be using. Who knows ? I might get you into character?"_

* * *

><p><em>Kendall's hand was on my waist, his other intertwined with mine. I'd never felt so self-conscious, though he looked at if that was something he did everyday.<em>

_The 'professional' as Miss had coined him, managed to source a book as thin as a newspaper. Our job: ensure that it didn't fall._

_I've never been close to boys. Never. Ironic as that might seem considering Kendall and I were best friends._

"_When the music begins, I don't want to see you as two people," he instructed in that deep voice of his, "I need you as one."_

_He clicked play. And I had to force myself not to laugh out loud._

We were both young when I first saw you.  
>I close my eyes, and the flashback starts,<br>I'm standing there,  
>On the balcony in summer air.<p>

I see the lights, see the party, the ballgowns.  
>See you make your way through the crowd,<br>And say, "Hello",  
>Little did I know,<p>

That you were Romeo,  
>You were throwing pebbles,<br>And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet."  
>And I was crying on the staircase,<br>Begging you, "Please don't go".

And I said,  
>"Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone.<br>I'll be waiting, all that's left to do is run.  
>You be the prince, and I'll be the princess,<br>It's a love story, baby, just say, 'yes'."

So I sneak out to the garden to see you,  
>We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if he knew,<br>So close your eyes,  
>Escape this town for a little while.<p>

'Cause you were Romeo,  
>I was a scarlet letter,<br>And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet."  
>But you were everything to me,<br>Begging you, "Please don't go".

And I said,  
>"Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone.<br>I'll be waiting, all that's left to do is run.  
>You be the prince, and I'll be the princess,<br>It's a love story, baby, just say, 'yes'."

"Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel.  
>This love is difficult, but it's real.<br>Don't be afraid, we'll make it of this mess,  
>It's a love story, baby, just say, 'yes'."<p>

Well, I got tired of waiting,  
>Wondering if you were ever coming around.<br>My faith in you was fading,  
>When I met you on the outskirts of town.<p>

And I said,  
>"Romeo, save me, I've been feeling so alone.<br>I keep waiting for you, but you never come.  
>Is this in my head,<br>I don't know what to think,"

He knelt to the ground,  
>And pulled out a ring and said,<br>"Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone.  
>I love you, and that's all I really know.<br>I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress,  
>It's a love story, baby just say yes."<p>

We were both young when I first saw you...

_Kendall's movements were fluid, perfect... so unlike mine. At times I wondered if he was laughing at me, but all I saw was he, with his lips pressed firmly together as though he was restraining himself from saying something. _

_It was the best thing he could do._

_At that moment, when the music stopped, we stayed together for a while. The closeness gave us the comfort we needed that we hadn't made a complete fool of ourselves. _

_He let go of my waist, keeping his hand in mine. A shock ran through my body. Electrifying. I looked up suddenly in his eyes, wondering if he was, as usual, playing some kind of joke._

_But brown met green at that point, his looking as surprised as mine._

"_You know what, Jo. I have something to tell you." _

_Those were his first words since we began._

"_What?"_

"_I think.. I think I lo..." he broke off._

_Jett had appeared at my side. _

"_Your dad's here." He said, making no mention of Kendall's presence. "And he has to drop me home today."_

_I looked at Kendall frantically but he seemed cold at that point. Right... It was Jett._

"_I'll see you tomorrow?" I asked, shouldering my bag._

"_Sure."_

_One word. Nothing else. And my mind raced on what he wanted to tell me..._


	5. Worst Lie Ever Told

**So... Merry Christmas everyone! My gift to all readers, but dedicated especially to a certain person who would kill me if I didn't finish this chapter in time for the 25th. But I did. So yay! :)**

**I liked this chapter for its emotional roller coaster of events but I find some things were kind of random. Yet important for the next chapter. If it's confusing, sorry... Will try to clarify anything in the following.**

**Enjoy!**

**~_Wynter_**

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER FIVE <strong>

_There was a reason I was drawn to the Performing Arts. It allowed me to become someone I was not… To break free of my personal bubble and see the world in a different light._

_But for the first time in my life, as an actor that is, it was not so._

_Juliet no longer seemed as another character whose role I took on. She became me… or I became her… Both ways, it's all the same._

_We were not two separate individuals._

_The most traumatizing of this change too was the fact that I was feeling too much. To Jett's face, I credited it to my superb acting prowess… but the truth is, you can never really lie to yourself._

_The truth was:_

_I was falling in love with Kendall Knight._

_How and why and when and where? It didn't matter. All I knew was that being on that stage with HIM made the experience all the more beautiful._

_And I would not feel the same with anyone else._

_But it was scary. Wondering, Worrying… whether it was possible for him to feel the same. Or we would always be just good friends, and leave it at that._

_Would he even be willing to be in a healthy relationship with me?_

_There were times I would see him going to class (with Selena, if I might add) and he seemed… different. Lighter even. I could see both of them together, if not then, in the near future and… I was scared._

_Scared that if I wasn't brave enough to tell him how I felt, I'd be forced to be brave enough to see him with other people. And I wasn't. I couldn't be._

_And yet, despite everything that was running through my head, I made it to Drama practice every evening with a big smile on my face, contenting myself with the reality that we WERE, and should always be, friends._

_And no emotion should come between that._

_Hopefully._

_The sad thing, my 'best friend' Jett just kept on making me more and more annoyed at him. Maybe he knew, somewhere in that big head of his, that if I had a choice in the matter, I'd stick with Kendall and not him. Why did this matter to him? I had no clue. All I wished was that he understand that I had all right to stay with someone who made me comfortable (most of the time) and not freak me out with random outbursts of quotes from Shakespeare._

_Why was he learning Kendall's lines?_

_It was only something I would later learn._

* * *

><p><strong>ONE WEEK BEFORE THE PLAY<strong>

"_Kendall," I whispered as he passed through the hall to get to our classes "Why is everyone looking at us funny?"_

_He shrugged nonchalantly but then said, "Has Jett said anything to you recently?"_

_I furrowed my brow. Now that he mentioned it… "Okay," I said finally, "What do you know that I don't?"_

_He smirked, and had I not have my powerful resolve, I would've melted._

_Maybe I did, in a matter of a second, but my blond friend did not have to know that._

"_Oh, I think I know many things that you don't."_

_I rolled my eyes. "No kidding there," I scoffed, "You and James have the time of your lives talking about stuff not-related to the text book."_

_He sniffed and held the spot over his heart. "You know me so well Jo."_

_I smiled. Mainly because it looked strange to see him do that._

"_Anywhose, d' you WANT to know the big rumor going around?"_

"_No," I replied simply._

"_Jo. That was a rhetorical question. You are going to hear it anyhow. Better from me…"_

_There was arguing with his decision after that, but the his tone of voice implied that whatever the news was, I wasn't going to pleased._

"_Maybe you should sit?" he offered helpfully._

_I acknowledged the bench at which he was pointing, and took a seat. He slumped down beside me._

"_Jo. How do you feel about dating?" he asked._

_Straight-forward question. Easy answer… relatively speaking. But my heart suddenly decided it was the best time to race one hundred miles per hour._

_Surely, we were not having this conversation NOW._

_Classes were in ten minutes._

_His green eyes were focused on mine, and I seemed to be having difficulty breathing. Could he sense my anxiety?_

_I hoped not._

"_Y… You know my dad," I began lamely "It's out of the question. When it comes to him."_

_He continued to stare at me. "What?" I asked._

"_You still haven't answered my question… What do YOU think?"_

_Lie or truth? Would it matter anyway? Yes.. to him… to me…_

_My mind was going in circles: no clear sense of direction._

"_I think… I mean, I don't think…" His expression changed… from open to somehow guarded, "I don't think I'm ready for it."_

_He looked away at a passing group of girls. "I'm asking blond Jennifer out on a date two nights before the play… What do you think?"_

"_Does this have to do with the rumor?"_

"_Yes… in a sense."_

"_I think… okay. By all means, go ahead." I managed a small smile, though my words seemed heavy with the lie._

_"So I was right."_

_"Right about what?" I asked, ignoring the slight change in Kendall's voice._

_"They... Everyone... thinks I'm in a relationship with you." I gaped as he continued, "I told them what you said for me to say, and they think YOU'RE the one in love with me."_

_"You believed them?" I said, my voice a bare whisper._

_" I didn't know what to think... We're friends, right? It could be possible...?" his voice drifted off, and he was refusing to meet my eyes._

_"Is it really okay with me and Jennifer?" he said finally._

_"Yep. Course it's good. Have fun." Suddenly fun lost all meaning._

_Yet I managed to continue. "But Kendall, if by chance, I felt that way. What would you say?"_

_He thought for a second._

_"I would say..." he mused, "I would say that our lives would be better without the drama. Friendship is much easier to deal with. No need for a relationship, right?"_

_He looked up at me, and our eyes met for that bare instant._

_It dawned on me then that I wasn't the only one hiding something... but with the blond, you could never be sure._

_And I was not willing to put my emotional stability on the line._

_"Yep." I agreed, "No need for relationships."_

_It was, by far, the worst lie I had ever told someone, and tried to convince myself it was the truth._


	6. Breaking Point

**This chapter was... interesting for me to write. Always fun but re-reading it is always the painful part. Ironically enough, it's a happy part of my story. So I hope you all like it :)**

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER SIX<strong>

_I managed to make it to school, portraying a girl who knew nothing of the rumour and more importantly, one who was unaware of the truth behind it._

_It had been so easy before- when Kendall suspected nothing, when Jett and I were just friends, with no conflicting emotions in between. But now... time had come for me to sort out what I needed in my life and that which I could reasonably do without._

_Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday... went reasonably well. Kendall spending more time with Selena, though occasionally coming to meet me. But Jennifer? He said he was going on a date with her, but why wasn't he having any extra communication between themselves?_

_But as I've probably said before, I don't, or rather, ever claim to know everything about Kendall Knight._

_But it didn't stop our conversations from seeming strained... and I hated them._

_By Thursday, I decided that I wasn't coming to school on the Friday- Kendall's big date, two days before the play, Math test..._

_But for once, all I wanted was some time away from him, and maybe, just maybe, he'd miss me._

_But, that was a stupid thought._

_After all, why would he? Kendall would have more important things in his mind than me. And I'd just have to accept that._

* * *

><p><em><strong>FRIDAY<strong> _

_"Dad, I don't think I want to go to school today," I managed to say at the breakfast table, still dressed in my PJ's. He looked up from his newspaper, a look of suble confusion crossing his face for an instant._

_"Why?" he asked, "Don't you have a maths test today?"_

_"The play is one SUNDAY, dad," I said, emphazing the day, "And I need a bit of work in scene 4..."_

_"And Math?"_

_"Miss will give it to me another day..."_

_He nodded. "That's good then." And he continued to read._

_I left the table feeling slightly regretful. I hadn't lied per say, but neither did I say the entire truth._

_..._

_I lay on my bed, listless and starved with boredom. Lunchtime... but I was anything but hungry. My phone lay silent on my bedside table, and more or less useless. After all, the only call that had come through for the day was from my dad._

_Which was expected._

_But Kendall? Nothing, absolutely nothing. Not a text. Did he even WANT to know why I wasn't in school? Someone who hardly missed a day?_

_I had begun ranting, which was not good. I was supposed to be able to keep my emotions in check. Just THINKING about the blond put me on edge._

_What was wrong with me?_

_I wanted him to care... After all, how hard was it to type "Where r u?" Hard enough. But ironically, had he sent that, I wasn't planning on replying. My personal revenge for the week I had with him._

_Not that he'd know that._

_I left my bedroom, making my way to the kitchen. Not intending to return to my bedroom anytime soon, I put the radio on, hoping to hear something to raise my dying spirit._

_Instead I realised someone was definitely plotting against me- more slow, mopey music..._

Heart beats fast

Colours and promises

Hard to be brave

How can I love

When I'm afraid to fall

Watching you stand alone

All of my doubt

Suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer...

I have died everyday

Waiting for you

Darling, don't be afraid,

I have loved you

For a thousand years

I'll love you

For a thousand more...

_At that point, I just switched it off, and threw a pillow at the sound system for good measure._

_..._

_I probably fell asleep soon after, waking up hearing someone knocking insistently at my door._

_"Jo... open up. I need to talk to you."_

_I shook off sleep, the voice sounding almost muffled in my head. Dad?_

_Why would he want to talk to me?_

_I got off the couch, checking the clock as I made my way to the front door._

_3:00. Dad had said he was coming around five. Two hours earlier?_

_I didn't think so._

_But my second possibility seemed almost unlikely._

_Actually, it was dead-on._

* * *

><p><em>"Kendall."<em>

_One word. That's all I could've managed. His presence on my doorstep had the same effect had he slapped me across the face, hard._

_His blond hair hung perfectly, framing his green eyes. But he was unsmiling. So like my father when he caught me doing some childish wrong when I was younger._

_"Jo."_

_I blushed, practically feeling the heat on my cheeks. . . Silently hoping that being in the shadow of the house hid the colour._

_"What's wrong?" I asked, becoming slightly peeved at his coldness, at each passing second._

_Silence. His glare fixed on mine._

_I began again. "If you've come here with nothing to say..."_

_"Why didn't you come to school today, Jo?"_

_His tone was crisp, to the point, but strained, as though he was withholding some emotion. I of all people could tell._

_"Because I just wanted to... and I needed some time to prepare for Sunday."_

_So far, calm. I amazed myself at times._

_"I supposed Jett did the same... Did he come over earlier?"_

_His question stung. I skipped school to hand out with Jett? Was he mental? Or trying hard to be?_

_I said nothing._

_"So you're going to be this way Jo?" Kendall somewhat spat, "Willing to deny the fact that you love someone to your best friend?"_

_Wait... was Kendall sounding bitter? It ended up making me feel more upset._

_"Why would I tell you Kendall. You wouldn't care either way."_

_"Really? You think so?" He paused, as if musing. _

_"I care if it's someone I hate... if it's someone who I KNOW will make your life miserable sooner or later. I care if you're making a mistake for the rest of your school life..." he faded out._

_I stared at my bare feet. "I care about the idiotic things you do, too," I whispered, more to myself than him, "I don't like Selena... she takes advantage of your niceness and Jennifer... if she could take her head out of the mirror long enough to SEE you, that'll be perfect."_

_Another awkward silence._

_Since when did we become awkward?_

_But then Kendall spoke up again._

_"Who do you love that I hate so much that you wouldn't tell me? Jett? Adam? The weird dude who sweeps the audit..?"_

_A smirk played on his lips. Oh Gods, he was trying to be funny. Why now? When every second that ticked by I was becoming more and more certain I was falling deeper in love with him. And we were FIGHTING..._

_His stupid smile._

_And stupid green eyes._

_We were best friends after all..._

_My mental resolve snapped._

_"You can't hate yourself."_


	7. Romeo and Juliet

**I've updated rather quickly I think. Maybe because I was kinda excited to write this part. You'll see why. I think it's the longest for this story I've written so yay.**

**The play part... not so sure how it sounds, or reads for that matter. Disclaimer: I did not write the script for Romeo and Juliet (the italics) **

**Hope it's okay. :)**

**Cheerio, Wynter.**

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPTER SEVEN<strong>

_Emotion was bubbling over within me. And for once, I could care less if I was blushing._

_Kendall was speechless. His eyes flickering between shock and... something I couldn't comprehend._

"_I think I'm going to be sick," I managed to whisper, turning quickly to go back inside. But I was forced to stop. After all, kinda hard to move anywhere if someone is holding on to your wrist._

"_For once," he purred, "You're being to yourself... and to me... and you want to go?"_

"_Yes," I answered mentally, but voiced, "Kendall, I can't... I shouldn't do this."_

"_Why?"_

"_You have a date later... and I'm not even supposed to be feeling this way."_

"_One, Jo. What if I was lying about that date? And two... you have all right to feel any way you want. Emotions are the only things we can't put strictures on."_

_His statements caught me off-guard. I was not expecting him to say that. 'Jo, you're crazy," maybe... though it would have hurt me. But, 'I might've been lying'. No. I felt the tears welling up in my eyes._

"_Why would you?"_

"_Because," he said, relishing my expression with a pause, "What if I needed to make sure you felt the same?"_

_What was I to say to that? Emotional turmoil. That's what it felt like. Ecstasy? Nervousness? Anxiety?_

_For now, I just showed confused._

"_Why 'what if'?" I asked, my own voice betraying me. He looked exactly how I felt. "Why don't you believe me?"_

_I looked away. "Because... everything you've ever said to me leaves a lot to be answered for. Remember? You said it'd be better if we weren't in a relationship. Living without the drama, right?"_

_I must've sounded a lot more bitter than I intended because he rested his hand on my cheek, until I met his eyes._

_He had never touched me. Never. In all the time I'd known him, comforting involved patting me on my head... and that was it. Well, telling me funny things until I laughed count too._

_Could he tell that my heart was somersaulting? I was running the risk of a heart attack?_

_And with that same determined expression I'd only seen him wear that one day in hockey... the same one that had scared me to no end... he said, _

"_I love you, Jo. I know I've been a jerk... and a couple of other things too... but today, now, it's the first time I'm ever being so true to someone."_

_What came over me at that moment, I have no idea, but I wrapped my arms around his neck, tears probably soaking his jersey, but he didn't seem to care. Kendall was warm, strangely soft for a hockey player, perfect in all regards._

_There __**I **__was._

_Crying as though my heart had been broken. Though it had never felt so whole._

_Somehow, during the course of all that, I told him I loved him. _

_He rested his head on mine, not saying a word. But I felt his lips against my hair._

_And yes, he was smirking._

_I found myself quoting Hamlet in my head. Guess I needed something to ground me to reality at that moment._

**Doubt thou the stars are fire;**

**Doubt that the sun doth move;**

**Doubt truth to be a liar;**

**But never doubt I love.**

**... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...**

**SUNDAY**

**THE NIGHT OF THE PLAY**

_The big night. When everything we had ever worked for could either bloom into fruition or crumble into ash at our feet. But we worked hard. Nothing could go wrong?_

_Unless I forgot my lines? Or there was a blackout? Or... or? _

_I felt someone enter my dressing room._

_"You look stunning," he whispered, his green eyes dancing._

_"Why Kendall Knight," I breathed, spinning around, "You look..." I choked on the last word. Hot? Overly handsome? They didn't seem enough. _

_He wore a black suit, a sword on his hilt, his blond hair made the most of in costuming. People were going to be talking about Romeo for a long time after the play._

_"Scared?" he asked, coming towards me._

_"You have NO idea."_

_"I think I do."_

_He wrapped me in a knowing embrace and inside, I swooned on the closeness. I needed this._

_"Good luck tonight," he whispered in my ear, "And don't forget I'll be there with you... well until we die in the end... but you get the idea."_

_I laughed. "Until the end," I repeated, "Don't forget to kill my brother..."_

_"James? He's actually looking forward to it." _

_He leaned over and kissed me on my cheek before leaving._

_And as the door clicked shut, I silently wished the tingly feeling where his lips met my face would never go away._

* * *

><p><strong>ACT ONE<strong>

_James walked on stage, carrying himself very well. Though he seemed to be withholding a laugh._**  
><strong>

**James  
><strong>

_This, by his voice, should be a Montague._  
><em> Fetch me my rapier, boy. What dares the slave<em>  
><em> Come hither, cover'd with an antic face,<em>  
><em> To fleer and scorn at our solemnity?<em>  
><em> Now, by the stock and honour of my kin,<em>  
><em> To strike him dead, I hold it not a sin.<em>

**Jett**

_Why, how now, kinsman! wherefore storm you so?_  
><strong><br>James**

_Uncle, this is a Montague, our foe,_  
><em> A villain that is hither come in spite,<em>  
><em> To scorn at our solemnity this night.<em>  
><strong><br>Jett **

_Young Romeo is it?_

**James**

_'Tis he, that villain Romeo._

**Jett**

_Content thee, gentle coz, let him alone;_  
><em> He bears him like a portly gentleman;<em>  
><em> And, to say truth, Verona brags of him<em>  
><em> To be a virtuous and well-govern'd youth:<em>  
><em> I would not for the wealth of all the town<em>  
><em> Here in my house do him disparagement:<em>  
><em> Therefore be patient, take no note of him:<em>  
><em> It is my will, the which if thou respect,<em>  
><em> Show a fair presence and put off these frowns,<em>  
><em> And ill-beseeming semblance for a feast.<em>

**James**

_It fits, when such a villain is a guest:_  
><em> I'll not endure him.<em>

**Jett**

_He shall be endured:_  
><em> What, goodman boy! I say, he shall: go to;<em>  
><em> Am I the master here, or you? go to.<em>  
><em> You'll not endure him! God shall mend my soul!<em>  
><em> You'll make a mutiny among my guests!<em>  
><em> You will set cock-a-hoop! you'll be the man!<em>

Reading Jett's expression was not hard. And nor was the thought that crossed James' face for a brief second at that line. Jett enduring Kendall? That was near impossible. I was amazed James managed to stay in character, and not burst into laughter which was expected. That boy was going to be a great actor some day.

**James**

_Why, uncle, 'tis a shame._

**Jett  
><strong>_Go to, go to;_  
><em> You are a saucy boy: is't so, indeed?<em>  
><em> This trick may chance to scathe you, I know what:<em>  
><em> You must contrary me! marry, 'tis time.<em>  
><em> Well said, my hearts! You are a princox; go:<em>  
><em> Be quiet, or-More light, more light! For shame!<em>  
><em> I'll make you quiet. What, cheerly, my hearts!<em>

**James**

_Patience perforce with wilful choler meeting_  
><em> Makes my flesh tremble in their different greeting.<em>  
><em> I will withdraw: but this intrusion shall<em>  
><em> Now seeming sweet convert to bitter gall.<em>

**Exit...**

* * *

><p>And then there we were. Kendall and I. Did it matter at that moment that his hand was on my waist, mine on his shoulder... ballroom dancing in front of the hundreds of people... INCLUDING my father? No.<p>

It was just he and I. The world drowned out.

And Kendall had a way of looking at me that made me wish that it was true.

**Kendall**  
><em>If I profane with my unworthiest hand<em>  
><em>This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this:<em>  
><em>My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand<em>  
><em>To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.<em>

He let go of my waist and caressed my cheek. Like the first time.

**Jo**  
><em>Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much,<em>  
><em>Which mannerly devotion shows in this;<em>  
><em>For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch,<em>  
><em>And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.<em>

**Kendall**  
><em>Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?<em>

**Jo**  
><em>Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.<em>

**Kendall**  
><em>O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do;<em>  
><em>They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.<em>

**Jo**  
><em>Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.<em>

**Kendall**  
><em>Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take.<em>  
><em>Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged.<em>

He let go of me altogether, running his hand through my hair, the other cupped my face. I tried to read his eyes. And what they said, scared me to no end. He wanted to. Now. In front of everyone.

"Don't freak out." That's what he wanted to say.

And the truth was, I could think of no better time.

**Jo**  
><em>Then have my lips the sin that they have took.<em>

He moved with a fluidity I had never seen before. He leaned down, ever so slowly and united our lips. Kendall'' were soft, softer than I expected. And I suppose I was somewhat frozen in disbelief before I responded. Those cliche fireworks. The sparks. Everything I''d ever heard or read that could have prepared me for this moment, seemed insignificant. As though writers missed out on a lot on how it actually felt.

Kendall forced himself to pull away. I felt it. We both wanted to go on forever. But we managed to continue. Sounding slightly out of breath, but hopefully no one could tell.

**Kendall**  
><em>Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged!<em>  
><em>Give me my sin again.<em>

With every kiss I felt myself growing more in love with him. Knowing, just by simply knowing, that I was not the only one who wanted this. The second time has harder to stop. His warmth comforted me. But we did.

**Jo**  
><em>You kiss by the book.<em>

My voice wavered slightly. Quite the opposite really.

...

**Nurse**  
><em>Madam, your mother craves a word with you.<em>

I left, managing a small smile to Kendall.

**Kendall**

_What is her mother?_

**Nurse**  
><em>Marry, bachelor,<em>  
><em>Her mother is the lady of the house,<em>  
><em>And a good lady, and a wise and virtuous<em>  
><em>I nursed her daughter, that you talk'd withal;<em>  
><em>I tell you, he that can lay hold of her<em>  
><em>Shall have the chinks.<em>

**Kendall**  
><em>Is she a Capulet?<em>  
><em>O dear account! my life is my foe's debt.<em>

**Carlos**  
><em>Away, begone; the sport is at the best.<em>

**Kendall**  
><em>Ay, so I fear; the more is my unrest.<em>

**Jett**  
><em>Nay, gentlemen, prepare not to be gone;<em>  
><em>We have a trifling foolish banquet towards.<em>  
><em>Is it e'en so? why, then, I thank you all<em>  
><em>I thank you, honest gentlemen; good night.<em>  
><em>More torches here! Come on then, let's to bed.<em>  
><em>Ah, sirrah, by my fay, it waxes late:<em>  
><em>I'll to my rest.<em>

* * *

><p>In essence... it was one of the best nights of my life.<p> 


End file.
